Girlfriends are always in the Plan

If there was a message I could take away from 2015 it would be this, Our plans may not always go according to THE plan. Sometimes you just have to learn to go with the flow. More than one in this year has the been my lesson but recently this is what my girlfriends and I did earlier this month. It had been a moment since we last got together so we planned to go to a nice restaurant and do a gift exchange. one girlfriend was having some difficulties with some prior engagements and wanted to reschedule but she suggested that the other two of us still went. The other was just home relaxing and comfortable waiting for the word so she could get up and ready. I was already to go but in the back of my mind thinking about my budget. No, this was a group effort, it was all or nothing. How could we still spend some time together, have girl talk and exchange gifts? We decided to just go to one of the ladie's houses. We didn’t have to be in a hurry or get all dressed up. We could stay in our sweats, snack on some cheese, crackers, veggies and wings, sip on some sweet red wine, decompress with just us girls and then have our smiles back on our faces because of the positive vibes and lovely energy that we experience when we all get together. Being in that setting was not what we had planned on doing but it was most needed. Over the past 10 months the company of these two ladies has been the completion of my inner circle. Unique in their own way, we have a bond like no other. They have helped me feel welcomed at and at home in Kentucky. They have been some of my biggest supporters and shoulders. We group chat about things that happen in our lives on a daily basis and we always make sure to leave one another feeling uplifted and loved. So I guess the message I want to leave you with is this, I am okay with change. With this years’ unexpected change I have encountered some of the most pleasant surprises. My year has transpired in an unimaginable way for me. I have no complaints for the events that have taken place this year and I look forward to many more joyful experiences. I know I will take these on with ease with the support of my two trusty girlfriends. 

ABCs of Gratitude

A few months ago I started the Gratitude Challenge...I don't think I finished but one of the assignments was to write your personal ABCs of gratitude. As Thanksgiving is later on this week I felt it was more than an appropriate time for me to share and publish what I am grateful for. I hope you will also take time to reflect on what you are grateful for, for I truly believe we have more to be grateful for than we do to complain about. You may not have everything you want but you have everything you need.

My ABCs of Gratitude, I am grateful for...

Air- to breathe

Bible- to read and learn and grow in God

Car- my gift to myself a few years back

Doggies- Pomeranians to be exact

Erica (my sister)

Dad (RIH)

Friendships- all of them

Garage- to keep my fancy car and motorcycle in House

Inspiration there's a myriad of things that keep me going 

Jonathan (my brother)

Kisha (for sharing this gratitude journal with me)

Love- it really does make the world go round

Mom- she's my best friend

Nephews- what a difference boys make when they live with you

Outdoors- I enjoy nature, especially the changing of the seasons

Papa- he truly is my favorite man in the whole wide world

Quiet time- this is when I can reflect 

Relaxation- I have peace

St Stephen's Church- a blessing to me here in Kentucky

Time- it's not promised 

Unity- I love togetherness 

Vision (physically, spiritually and mentally)

Water- (something we often take for granted)

X??😁

Young people- (they are our future and I hope to mentor and inspire as many as possible)

Zoo - (I love animals)

Hope you enjoyed my list. Thanks for ready in my blog. I'm grateful for my followers. Share with your friends. Be blessed 

-Joi 

@jonitab #GratitudeChallenge 

It's ok to take your time.

What's taking you so long? This was my thought this morning when I pondered doing my next blog. It's been months!! Why have I taken so long to put some more thoughts on paper? Plenty has transpired since my last entry. I've been traveling for work, I've spent some time adventuring in Chattanooga and I've even enjoyed some more family time going to my nephews basketball games. Life has just been happening. And it has been good. I've also been spending a lot of time with my significant other. That's all the details you get at the moment. Usually when I sit and write I have a particular topic or theme that I'm focused on but not this time. Lately my thoughts have been focused towards my goals and plans for the upcoming year and finishing this year on a positive note. 

Many times whe we are consumed with our plans and moving full steam ahead we forget to rest. Taking a time out is unheard of. Lately for me my body has let me know otherwise. Taking a break is mandatory. Last week was the first time in I don't know how long that I came home and took a nap. I wasn't rushing to get out the house. I was tired so I listened to my body and got some rest. The same thing happened the other day. I'm out of town visiting with family and making p,and to see friends but after one afternoon outing I didn't feel like doing anything else so I put on pjs around 5pm and was sound asleep before 730pm. I woke up a few times but I didn't push myself to go hang out. I miss my friends and I value our time together but personal wellness comes first. 

So as we are in the last few weeks of this year I will continue to focus on what matters the most. Peace and wellness which come from spending time with God first and foremost. Devotional time and prayer, thanksgiving and reading the His word, this is where my guidance and Help come from. Spending time with myself, taking personal time for meditation, self reflection and awareness. Making sure I am at peace with myself. Every now and then you should check in with you to make sure you're ok. Spending time with my family, they are my strongest supporters and they keep me grounded. They are my reason for trying so hard to accomplish my goals and dreams. I'll spend as much time as possible with my significant other. He's extremely talented, smart, sweet and charming and he makes me happy, keeps me laughing and encouraged. These elements are my base and my foundation. With them I am grounded and in order to accomplish my future goals and dreams checking back in to home base with allow me to launch into 2016 in an amazing way. 

Dream BIG! Rest up. Enjoy family, friends and loved ones. Finish the year happy. Look forward to new beginnings. Be blessed

-Joi

Your Acquaintance Ability

Yesterday I experienced one of the most horrible feelings. For some it may not be a big deal but for me it was heart breaking. A treasured friendship ended. I was shocked, confused, torn and beyond hurt. It felt like a breakup. Like I could feel the fibers of our connection being ripped apart. I wish that feeling on no one. Now I have aquaintances that say they have the ability to cut people off and ignore situations. Yeah, I don't possess that trait. People are important to me. There's a love that I feel for the human race that keeps me careful of how I treat the next man. A few years back I dreamingly stated my desire of philanthropy. If only I were a millionaire 😊 yes I realize there are actions I can take to help humanity like feed the hungry or making donations to those less fortunate. We've been afforded such blessings; if we wake up each morning, having food, shelter, clothing, and freedom what can we possibly complain about? Count your blessings. The essentials are taken care of. Most of our wants and desires are at our fingertips as well. Besides our life, health and strength the commodity we should not take for granted is people, relationships, connect-ability, interactions. You are a precious irreplaceable gift. You possess skills and talents. You're a beautiful treasure chest, a one in a million. No one has experienced life like you have and no one care share those experiences but you. See with what I experienced losing this friend I had to shift my focus. I recognize my own strengths, talents and abilities. I know my own awesomeness and I believe sharing is caring. I like making friends but I can't force anyone to like me back. That lesson took years for me to learn but It's all good. Some blessings are not meant for everyone to enjoy. How someone feels about you has little to do with you but much to do with them, their own perception and reality. How they view the world through their lenses may be a little foggy. No worries, keep doing you and remain AWESOME 

CREATE. DREAM. PLAN. ACCOMPLISH. In that order😊

CREATE the moment you want to experience. Since I'll be away for awhile I PLAN to spend time with friends so today I'm having a brunch. As an extrovert this is where I get my energy from 😊. Positive people add to my happiness. 

I DREAM of spending my day out and about enjoying this beautiful weather. I did just that. Saturday mornings 😊 where I rarely sleep in, I took part in my usual ritual. Well at least I started to, a 3 mile run around the lake. It was more like 2 and a quarter with the first mile being a run and the rest being a walk. With a short break to sit and take in God's wonders and talk with Him for a few moments, truly the most important part of my day. My brunch was amazing and honestly just something we decided earlier this week. Good food always brings us together and I hadn't seen my girlfriends or neighbors as often as I normally would. Considering I was about to be gone for awhile enjoying my friends and time off to the max was my goal. After the brunch I wanted to go to the zoo but the rain helped me decide on going to the movies instead. I was blessed to be able to take my girlfriend's twin girls with me and have some time with them. I don't take those moments lightly. No matter if it's 20 minutes or 6 hours, whenever I'm around them I make it my GOAL to pour into them a life lesson. We enjoyed "Tomorrowland", an absolutely amazing movie.  We headed to SmashBurger before evening service at church. A first for the girls and they liked it. Church was great too. We, God's people have an important role to play for changing the world around  us. Don't just get frustrated and give up on your community. Be the light God created you to be. Well, back to my day, we finished the night with shakes from Sonic once their mom got off of work. 

Needless to say my mission of ENJOYABILITY and CREATIVITY was ACCOMPLISHED in that order. Great food, great friends, great company, an awesome Word and an overall AMAZING DAY!! I am truly blessed!! Now to make that happiness spread over the next 30 days as I be all I can be! I'm sure I'll be inspired to write about this venture. 

Thank you for reading. Be Inspired.

Joi

Fight with all your might but choose your battles wisely.

Last week I was challenged to tell one of my stories, something I had experiences but to keep it light. Nothing too heavy but to still bring hope and encouragement. I had some stories in mind but none recent so I found this assignment somewhat challenging as I sometimes tend to make most situations in my life way more serious than they really are (😐 hmmm a lesson all in itself) no telling how many times I'd been told, Joi don't worry, take it easy, it's not that serious. Tuuhhh you don't know my life and how things make me feel! 😏 I had to ask myself why do I take things to heart so?? Like last week. I had to do Army combative. Our version of MMA fighting. I was all geekedand and excited a few weeks ago. Ready to jump in and tackle any challenge, school, task or mission that my new unit had for me so as to add more diversion and variety to the array of things I had already accomplished in my career. What's a week of learning different clench drills, chokes and moves learning how to break someone's arm?😳 yeah not so much. I was called last minute, on my day off to go ahead and join in the class, right after a physical therapy appointment. Somehow that didn't match up but I agreed anyways. Regardless of how I'm feeling I've always been one to sacrifice personal gain for the betterment of this great Army I serve but lately I didn't feel like the Army was serving me well. See I just got a notification that kinda threatened my career. All these questions are now in my mind. How will I make it? How will I pay my bills? No need to worry, I'll have plenty of time to plan. So day 1 of this grappling and closing distance, straddling my battle buddies in a wrestling type of position, learning different techniques of being a warrior and fighter. This so does not fit my personality. I'm not a physical fighter. With all the things going on in my head as of right now I'm not even thinking about fighting. Ok I can do this. One of the instructors has taken time out to catch me up on where the class is. I'm recalling some of these terms and hold as we are talking through them and he's demonstrating. This isn't too bad, it's Army survival right? Here it comes to the end of the day when it's time to put to use what we've learned and roll around on the mat with our partners and execute these different techniques of gaining dominant positions and submission. It's physicsl and it's rough and I don't like it. I freeze up. I feel like I'm in a real fist fight although we aren't punching and kicking we are trying to keep one another pinned down. Now we're excurting most of our strength. My issue occurs when I realize I'm not as strong as this full grown man I'm tussling with. He's literally over powering me. I want to scream, kick, cry. I feel myself getting flushed. Get off of me!! That's enough I say, I'm done! He stops and lets me up. The way I'm feeling I'm ready to cry so to the bathroom I go. A few tears, I gotta catch my breath. Okay, now a little self talk. Come on Joi. You can do this, no I can't, yes you can. Ok calm down, wipe your eyes. Go back out there. A few battle buddies ask if I'm ok. The only other female on the class is more personable. Us girls gotta stick together. I tell her what's going on. She's very sympathetic. I talk to my supervisor after class. Right off the bat, he's like hey none of us are really grasping this, just go through the motions. Ok I guess. I can do that and leave the emotions out of it. The next day is a little easier. I made it. The day after they I made it, different drills, less rolling on the ground. Still fighting but it's about self defense. The next day, we have an opponent. Good thing is we work with them so they aren't strangers. Bad thing is they get to punch us. Every bit of adrenaline and courage I have I'm using, no holding back. I get in the ring which mind you looks like an MMA cage. Only one way out, and that's with a win. We go 3 rounds I make it through each one. The worst is over. Finishing the class will nod be simple; a written test and some hands on. I learned for this experience that I really can overcome even when it means facing things I'm not into. Everything about physical fighting goes against the heart of my morals and character. I had to choose a different perspective. I chose to keep it light, I took my own limits, weights and constraints off. The mental fight I was in a few days before was kicking my butt. I had to overcome that and do what I had to do. So truth be told, I am a fighter and I fought to get over myself, my emotions, my fears and complete the task! So fight with all your might but choose your battles wisely. 

Strength Is all there is to it, and I can't apologize for it

After a recent conversation with my neighbors, I started to notice a pattern. Every time I would mention what I thought was a character flaw, I was gently reminded that it was a strength. The Mrs. of the husband and wife team that I had come to respect and notionally adopt as another set of parents, would find a way to include it in every conversation. No matter what situation I bring up, she always finds the good in it. Recently some of our conversations have been focused on relationships. Here am I wondering why that special young man hasn't come around and stayed, expressing the desire to pursue a relationship with me that will prayerfully lead to marriage and I think I'm scaring them all away. Maybe I am but it's not a weakness or a downfall. It really is my strength and confidence in knowing who I am and what I want. But let me share this. I've met some amazing, ambitious, talented and handsome eligible bachelors and although they may have initially considered me to be beautiful and strong it seems my strength was a little too much for them or they just were not ready for everything I have to offer. By know means can I let this discourage me. First of all if he's bold enough to speak and show interest then he will. If he's confident in who he is and committed to getting to know me with out feeling pressured then he will stay around. If my conversation and the sharing of my relationship goals don't scare him away but attract him we may be off to a good start. Note for all my male readers, especially my secret admirers, thank you. Please don't take this the wrong way. These are just my thoughts about the situation at hand. I've never been asked so many times then in the past few months why I'm single. I have no children, I have high morals and character. I love Jesus and I'm an all around type of girl. Everything is right with me. I'm patiently awaiting to be approached and pursued by the right one. Who knows, maybe this blog will peak someone's interest and cause them to reach out 😊 Clearly I'm not afraid to share what others may just speculate about. 

Fast forward another month, I recently had the privilege of sharing some awesome quality time with one of my sisters in Christ. It's been years since we've seen each other and we didn't even miss a beat. Matter fact we put it at a double time. The conversations we've been able to share have been very delightful. She too complimented and encouraged me. I was able to share with her some of my hardships and like my neighbor she helped me see the strength in what I'd overcome. I write this gracefully with a new perspective that I'm okay. I'm comfortable being me. My character strengths developed with the victories of my accomplishments and overcoming many of my challenges. Not one situation was allowed to destroy me. Some of it was fertilizer to help me grow. I'm grateful for the way I carry myself and the level of respect my demeanor invites. There's something good to be said of a young lady who pursues a particular disciplined lifestyle. It may not be popular but she's not trying to win a contest. She's simple just trying to be her best. One of my favorite scriptures help me consistently take confidence in who God has created me to be. "She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future." (Proverbs 31:25 NLT) I'm so grateful that I have finally come to a place where I am happy with me, regardless of what I have been through, it takes nothing away from my awesome, strong, bold and daring personality. Life is a learning process. It refines us if we let it so we can be great. 

Be blessed. Be inspired. Thanks for reading.

-Joi